Tales from the ER....

So it's been awhile since I've done one of these, but I just had to share my story with you...

Last night, I pull up to work and there's one ambulance, one fire truck, and five police cars outside the ER door. Now the ambulance and fire truck are nothing, but the five police cars, that's a bit unusual. I walk in and hear someone screaming and yelling, not unusual. So I peek my head into the room to see what was going on. I see a black woman lying on the bed, in four-point restraints (both wrists and ankles.) Alex, our tech, and 5 or 6 officers were in the room with her. I went to go see if any patients were in triage and then came back to watch the show. That was when Alex grabbed me and told me she needed help. Apparently the woman was half dressed and because all the officers were male, we needed to get her covered up. So we walk into the room and this is what happens....

The woman is lying on the bed with her shorts around her ankles. We didn't bother trying to get her shorts up, we were more concerned with just covering her up and decided to throw a sheet on her. But she kept twisting around so the sheet would fall off. (I need to insert here that the woman was clearly homeless, and a drug addict. She was dirty and stinky. Emphasis on stinky!) So Alex and I kept trying to tuck the sheet under her, but somehow she managed to keep taking it off. She kept saying "My p---y is sweaty! My p---y is sweaty!" We finally got her covered up and I left to find out from the officers what the story was.
Apparently, the woman was a lady of the night. She was found riding on the roof of the car of her john, naked, down Beach Blvd. The story was that he had picked her up in a neighboring county 10 hours earlier, they had spent the day together doing what they do. Then she freaked out on him, kicked out his car windows and climbed on top of his car, while he was still driving. He just kept driving with her screaming and yelling, naked on top of the car. Good samaritans called 911.

We had a good laugh, picturing that, and wondering what kind of guy wants to get his next to hers. So the police keep interviewing her and it comes out that she's got a crack pipe stashed in a very intimate spot. Because the police are taking her to jail, we've gotta get that out. So I went to tell the doctor the good news. He tried to get me to do it, but I told him because he's got the fancy degree he gets the pleasure. So Alex, the doctor and I walk into the room. He tells the lady of the night what he going to do and she yells out, as loud as she can, "Oh no you ain't! My p---y is sore! Too much been goin' on down there already today. You ain't doin' nothin'! My p---y hurts!"

Since the patient refused we can't do anything about it. Because the police need her clothes for evidence, we've got to strip her down, and since all the officers are guys, Alex and I get the pleasure of doing it. So we strip her down, stick her in a biohazard suit and send her out with the officers. And thank the ER gods that they didn't decide to just leave her with us all night.

About 4 or 5 hours later, I get a text message from one of the officers...the crack pipe had just fallen out onto the jail floor. In the cell next to her was the john, I'll let you figure out how the crack pipe fell out!

Sometimes, if I didn't experience these nights first hand, I wouldn't even believe it was real.

Mother's Day

I had intended to do this post all about how this was the first Mother's Day without my grandma and all that, but I changed my mind after I went to Utah this weekend. Jay and Jared wanted to go hunting, but they were going during the week and Mandie had to work, so I went along to watch Chloe.
I have babysat tons of kids, ever since I was about 12 years old. And I have even watched my cousin's kids for a weekend when they went out of town. But I either only watched them for a day, or I had someone else to watch them with me. This time, it was just me. Morning til night. I had no idea how much work a 13 month old can be. She's up at 7 AM, we had a cuddle while watching Dora first thing. But then it was go, go, go...all day long. Play time, then breakfast, then more playtime while I was making breakfast, all the time trying to keep an eye on her. After breakfast was a bath, and then, thank goodness, nap time. But it was nap time just for her. This was my one chance to get a shower. Then I scarfed down some breakfast myself, and cleaned up the mess. By this time, she was up again. Playing and then lunching and constantly following me, wondering what I was doing. Oh my golly! By the time bedtime came around at 8, I was ready to put myself to bed too. She just wore me out!
But, oh those little moments...when I was making lunch and her little smiling face peeked around the corner...when pushing her on the swing and listening to her laugh...when we were laying on the floor playing and she pointed out my eyes, nose, and teeth, and knew where her own were as well. When rocking her to sleep, and she turned and cuddled up in my arms, and gave that little sigh that meant she was truly asleep, peaceful, happy and content. Those little moments more than made up for the fact that I hadn't worn makeup in 3 days, my hair had been in a ponytail for 3 days, and I couldn't get dora's songs out of my head. Life, and motherhood, is all about those moments.

Thanks, to all the moms out there. And a big thanks to my mom, who did that with three kids. I love you Mom!

Tales from the ER...

Just a quick one here....

My patient last night tried to kill himself. (And don't get all outraged, I'm not making fun of people who try to commit suicide, only those who are bad at it! Ok, ok, that's not funny either! Sorry!) Anyway he tried to hang himself. He said that he is on narcotic pain meds for chronic back pain, but that they are weaning him off the meds. So he usually takes one half of a pill every day. Well last night he wanted another half pill, but since his wife wouldn't give it to him he decided to hang himself. He went out to the garage, climbed up on the counter, and put an electrical cord around his neck. He tied the cord to a pipe running over head and jumped off the counter. The problem? He's 6' 7'' and the cord was too long. So the police arrived and he was just standing there, with the cord around his neck. The police cut the cord, but he started fighting with them, so they tazed him.
Then they brought him into the ER. After the police left him there, he became aggressive and started yelling and swinging at people. So we tied him down, and then we gave him meds to sedate him.
So, he failed at trying to kill himself, got tazed, got tied to the bed, and got a catheter. And still didn't get his other half of the pain pill! And you thought you had a bad day!

Flashback Friday

So with all the hubub about immigration, and what's constitutional, I thought I'd post a flashback pic from my first trip to DC. Unfortunately, the only pic from that trip that I have scanned is not a great one, but I'm gonna post it anyway. So it's me and a cute Air Force boy on the steps of the capital building. It was August 1999. We did a trip to NYC, DC, Philadelphia, Gettysburg, and Pennsylvania Dutch Country, and we did it all in 7 days. We did not get much sleep! So on this night we went to the capital building to watch the Air Force band give a concert. After the concert we were just hanging out on the lawn and we saw fireflies! It was the first time I had seen fireflies. So Mom taught us how to smack them so they would keep glowing. We were catching fireflies on the front lawn of the capital building, it was a surreal moment. Anyway, I'll try to scan some more pics from that trip, it really was an awesome vacation!

Ladies....

I had an epiphany last night at work. Ok, maybe epiphany is too big of a word, but I did realize something important. I was chatting with another nurse and she started telling me all about this patient she had earlier today. She was telling me how he was playing with himself, but the language she used was very crude and graphic. This nurse is older and married, and I thought what happened to the times when these things weren't discussed in front of unmarried women. I realize that in the profession that I am in, we deal with bodies, and bodily functions and sometimes seeing people naked is part of that. But do we really need to discuss it outside of the medical aspects? It was really kind of offensive to me.
Later that night I got a patient, a young girl, who was just arrested for drunk driving. She was brought in by the police because she had wrecked her car. As the police were drawing her blood to check her blood alcohol level she launched into a profanity laced tirade. Now, these officers were being very nice to her, and were intending to just issue her a ticket and let her go, but when she started screaming at them, and calling them every nasty name in the book, they decided to take her in. I wish she could have seen herself, and the look on her face, as the filthiness spewed from her mouth. And again I thought, what happened to the days when men wouldn't even use those words in the presence of ladies, let alone the thought of ladies using them. 
And then I realized that I too had used those words, not frequently, but I have been known to bust out a 4 letter word once in a while. And then I realized that we women are not acting like ladies any more. And then I decided that I am going back to being a lady. When someone starts discussing inappropriate things with me, I will take a stance, I will say that I find that offensive or inappropriate and walk away. When someone starts spouting the bad words, I will remind them that there are ladies present and we don't talk like that in front of ladies. I will watch myself to make sure that I don't behave in un-ladylike ways.
This doesn't mean that I will be a pushover. Quite the opposite really. I will take a stand for what I believe in, and I will act in accordance with those beliefs. Hold me accountable, if you hear a profane word from my mouth, let me know. If I say something that you think is inappropriate for a lady to say, let me know. And I will do the same for you.
Girls, I urge you to act like ladies. Let's do this, and let's change the world while were at it. One lady at a time.

Flashback Friday

Yes I know I missed last week, but ohwell.
So this week I was talking with one of the girls I work with about ear candling. She had heard about it and wondered what it was like. I had completely forgotten about doing this. My cousins live in Arizona and several years ago when we were there visiting my cousin's wife mentioned doing this. She had some of the candles and I wanted to try it so I did. It feels weird, like a tickle in your ear. I didn't notice if they were any cleaner or notice any difference in hearing or anything afterwards, but there was a bunch of junk on the plate. Although that could have just been ash from the candle. Anyway here is a pic of me getting my ear "candled."

She's really on the move now...

Got this video last night...


and this one today...


Love my baby girl. Jay said she's all over the place these days. She loves to play hide and seek, she hides behind stuff and waits until you say "where's Chloe" before she pops out. She is smiling and playing all the time. Love her so much!